Ok Ladies and Gentlemen. Here it is. The first of the weekly blog sessions by your's truly. Sure it's two days late but fuck you I had a lot of shit on my plate this week. I say if life shits on you made water like that guy from Surviorman.

Anyway, I'm going to start by saying that the Internet is the beginning of the downfall of man. Well to be more precise on the matter it's less the internet and more Social Networking sites. Now don't get me wrong there are some honest to Bob good sites out there. But tonight I would like to talk about the most notorious SNS's, Myspace and Facebook....or as from here on out I will refer to them as MyStalk and Rapebook.

I understand that this may sound so very Mickey Rooney but let me just say I think that being able to know everything about someone without actually communicating with them is such a terrible idea. I mean sure you could say that this all started back with the ancient AIM Profiles from back in the day....which by the way was a wednesday....But see with AIM profiles you were limited to a pile of inane rambling usually smashed together poorly by a teenager. But now...Oh but now...

You would think that you could find more information about someone by Googling them but really if you look at someone's Mystalk of Rapebook you can find out all of the things they like, dislike, do, don't do, listen to, watch, buy, wear, read, see on the bus, blog about, etc. Hell if you through a twitter into the mix you could probably find out about their goddamn bowel movements. Now you would think that it sounds safe enough right? Only my friends can see all this....WRONG!

Did you know that 4 out of 7 profile on MyStalk and Rapebook are marked public because the average user is too stupid to go onto it and mark it private, or perhaps they think "Nah, it'll be fine. No one I don't know will ever see this." Suuure....no one except for that creepy guy that follows you around you college campus because you posted your fucking class schedule on Rapebook. Not only does he now know where you are at all time but at this point he's managed to even sneak into PICTURES....you see that guy in the window? THAT'S HIM. Rapebook even gives you the cute option to tag him as "crazy guy who will probably rape me before stabbing the shit out of me 45 times and leaving my useless body in a ditch".

But let's focus on MyStalk for the moment. Not only is it the home of more pedophiles than an unattended orphanage in the country woods but I mean damn. Women are half naked all up on this. Now don't get me wrong I have nothing against half naked women but do you know how many desperate creepy dudes are ON the internet? Lemme rephrase that...do you know how many desperate creepy dudes MADE the internet? Two words...AL GORE. LOCK BOX. and he doesnt mean for MONEY honey.

Ladies I know you've all met that guy online who seems like he's perfect right? Because you guys have the same thing in common from your love of Matthew Mcconaughey (I had to google his last name) to your love of the Wheelbarrow position!

Listen ladies, and guy's I'm sorry to burst your bubble. I had to break it to you when I say this but quote me...hell I'll quote myself. "He's just not that into you.He just wants to PUT that INTO YOU."

But RJ! I googled your name and you're all over the place! I can find out everything about you. I even see you wear size 13 shoes! Well of course. But I suppose I put that information out there freely realising the possibilities where I might get fucked. I guess that's the cost of internet fame. I want this to be my job so where better to find my information that my office aka the internet. Before you say "Well I want fame too!" I'm sure you do. But I don't let my tits hang half out of my shirt to get it nor do I let my non-existant abs flex for the camera on MyStalk.

I guess the message I'm trying to deliver here is telling Young America to be a little smarter about what you put on these here internets. Don't believe me? Google yourself. Test me. Prove me wrong PLEASE. On top of that...ladies and gentlemen alike I want you to go ask your significant other if they looked at your MyStalk or RapeBook before they dated you.....

Be more careful with the info you put on the Interwebs ok? Why? Because RJ SAYS!

Questions? Comments? Curse Words? Direct them at my email box and I'll get back to you ASAP